Laid Off: And Sober Curious
"When I am invited to return to a full time role that I’m excited about, I will not be pouring from an empty cup."
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In today’s issue, we talk to a former creative strategist at Target on watching eclipses with friends, embracing sobriety, and finding community after a layoff.
Shelby Williams, 30, worked as a senior creative strategist at Target for nearly two years. It took about five minutes to lay her off.
“My department head’s manager read off a script.”
They cited a lack of work for the in-house creative agency as the reason behind the job cuts.
She got the news of her layoff in March of this year, but was officially laid off in May after a brief job search period.
During that period, she adopted a sober curious lifestyle.
Who was the first person you told after getting laid off?
My sister and my mom. They found out because I was crying in the living room.
What did you do about health insurance?
They gave a Cobra stipend as part of severance but I preferred to use it to live. I currently don’t have insurance.
How has being laid off changed your relationship to work?
It made me see myself as more than a cog in a machine for a company. It reaffirmed my faith in myself to persevere through hard times. It made me more of an optimist… on most days!
You embraced sobriety post-layoff. What about the sudden job loss had you reevaluating your relationship to alcohol?
In the days immediately following my layoff, I found myself feeling the urge to drink to fill the void that my work and projects had previously filled. At one point, a few weeks after receiving the initial news, my sister gave me advice to cut back my alcohol consumption and try to find other ways to fill my time after job searching.
Then, the eclipse happened. The city I live in happened to be in the zone of totality, so I went to a little eclipse party with a couple of close friends. When I gazed up at the solar phenomenon, I felt a mix of gratitude that I could experience it with people who cared for me, elation that I actually didn’t have to take off from work to take in the moment, and strength that I could find the discipline it would need not to stave off feeling every bit of emotion I felt in realizing just how small I, and my layoff, were in the grand scheme of life and all it has to offer.
Embracing sobriety has given me the mental clarity I needed to face my emotions directly, find ways to ground myself and give myself grace on the rough days, and use the time I have to focus on my health and wellness, in addition to finding new opportunities. It’s not for everyone, but it has helped me.
You also started going to therapy for the first time in the weeks following your layoff.
I hadn’t been in therapy regularly since 2020 and the company I was laid off from agreed to cover eight sessions of therapy that would be redeemable even beyond our last days, so I felt the timing could not have been better to start meeting with a therapist again.
In addition to the sessions being covered, I didn’t want my layoff to be the reason that I crashed out entirely. I’ve been there before and I honestly cherish the fact that I am able to wake up every day and say, while I may not currently have a job, I still matter, I still have value, I’m still here, and I’m proud of myself for pushing through!
What are your favorite resources for sobriety?
I have really loved accounts on Instagram dedicated to sharing guidance and even mocktail recipes, like @creativesobriety, @onthemocks, and @themindfulmocktail. As a strategist, I also enjoy reading about the strategy behind non-alcoholic beverage companies from writers like Peter Thickett from Sober Futures. There was a great piece in Plant Based from Katie Stone about not drinking.
What about for therapy? Were you able to find an affordable option?
My free sessions expired after a few months, so I’ve dialed back to monthly sessions while leaning into resources my therapist has recommended for further exploration of topics we’ve discussed. There’s one podcast she recommended called Upstream that I listen to often to develop a deeper understanding of how I might deconstruct capitalistic ideas that have been deeply engrained in how I move through the world.
Why do you think a layoff inspired this broader commitment to your wellbeing?
In the past, I have struggled to separate who I am with what I do and it has led me to reflect upon not just what I want from a job beyond monetary compensation, but also what I want from life beyond being a cog in the broader machine of capitalism.
To that end, I believe that presence is power and practicing radical self-acceptance is key to moving on from the hurdles we face in life. Using the time I have to commit to myself by going to therapy and going on walks and listening to podcasts and sitting in nature makes me feel that, when I am invited to return to a full time role that I’m excited about, I will not be pouring from an empty cup. I will be enriched enough to enrich those around me so that we may all learn, grow, and thrive.
You said being laid off made you more of an optimist.
While being laid off is an incredibly hard thing to go through, accepting that it is not the worst thing that has happened to me has made me feel more optimistic about the situation. I am grateful that being laid off has given me the time to devote to myself and my health in a way I otherwise couldn’t have.
I have also loved having the chance to develop deeper relationships with people in my community, my friends, and my family. This continues to strengthen my faith in humanity, even during times as polarizing as this.
You said it's important, post-layoff, to find a support system. What does a stable support system look like to you?
I was lucky to find community with my fellow laid off team members and the those who were able to stay at the company following the announcements. There was a job search period before my last day, during which my team led a reflection of great memories of each of us leaving, in addition to sharing notes of gratitude from each person staying at the company. I remember thinking when the meeting was scheduled, “well, this might get awkward, maybe I won’t go.” It ended up being one of the moments I cherish most from my time at that company.
Beyond my former colleagues, I lean on my sister a lot for support. We live together and I’m so grateful to have someone who really cares about me to spend time with, joke around with, and even embrace the sometimes mundane moments of looking for new work.
One thing that’s been important to me post-layoff has been making sure I still have things to look forward to. For me, spending time bonding with my friends at the occasional dinner party or craft night or yap session has really helped me to keep things in perspective. I also can’t discount the many new friends and acquaintances I’ve made in my community during this time.
You also said it's important not to isolate yourself. Are there spaces, virtual or IRL, that you found helpful in connecting with others, in finding a community?
Absolutely! Since being laid off, I’ve been able to connect with new people through organizations like the American Advertising Foundation’s Columbus Chapter and our local community space for women and gender expansive people of color, Zora’s House.
I’ve also loved connecting with performers, artists, and creators from one of Columbus’ great theatre companies, Available Light Theatre. Their shows are so thought-provoking and optimistic, plus they’re pay-what-you-want! Collaborating with members of the company on new ideas as a volunteer has become so fulfilling.
Finally, I love stopping by the Columbus Museum of Art for their free Sundays and often find myself snapping pics throughout the incredible exhibitions.
In terms of virtual spaces, I have enjoyed connecting with microinfluencers in Columbus through a company called Hummingbirds— they’re connecting brands to creators through local partnerships in a really smart way.
And a Discord for a niche culture podcast hates to see me coming! My favorites are Who? Weekly and Pop Pantheon.
Shelby is still looking for work as a brand or creative strategist. You can send her a message on LinkedIn.
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Reading this was like a much-needed hug. Thanks for the optimism.
Beautifully articulated feelings on our relationship with money, alcohol, and the wonders of optimism. Thank you for sharing, Shelby 💜