Laid Off: And Financially Supporting Her Parents
"My mom has dementia, and I’m her primary caregiver. I would’ve loved to have her support now more than ever. She was my best friend, my confidant, and my biggest cheerleader."
In today’s issue, we talk to a former Spotify worker on what it feels like to experience a layoff while financially supporting her parents, how she’s spending her severance, and ageism in the hiring process.
Jessica Dixon, 47, was laid off from her Campaign Manager position at Spotify this year after almost five years with the company.
Her layoff felt especially heavy — she’s financially supporting her parents. It’s why she’s so grateful for a severance package.
Jessica’s severance money will go toward helping her parents and herself until she finds another job.
“I’ll need to be as frugal as possible to make it last, and my hope is that I don’t run through it before finding something new.”
She says it’s important to be kind to yourself after a layoff, especially if you are providing for others. “It’s easy to feel like you’re letting down those you care for, but remember to give yourself grace.”
Jessica shares her layoff experience below.
How did they handle layoffs?
They put a meeting on my calendar with HR. I knew they were laying me off because the note indicated being locked out of my computer in a few hours. I didn't want to believe it but then I was advised of the restructuring in the meeting with HR. They told me to wrap up what I could and that my access would be shut off in a few hours. At 1:00pm EDT they locked me out.
Did you see it coming?
Nope, it was a total surprise. I was blindsided.
Who was the first person you told after getting laid off?
I told my dad. I actually help my parents financially so it was extra devastating to have been laid off.
What is it like experiencing a layoff when you're financially supporting your parents?
It feels like jumping out of a plane without knowing if your parachute will open. You’ll either glide safely to the ground or go splat like a cartoon character. It’s hard not to fall apart with so many unknowns. How will I take care of myself and those depending on me until I find another job? And when will that even happen, with the job market being such a dumpster fire right now?
That’s why I didn’t take time for myself after being laid off. The same Monday, after I was officially locked out around 1 p.m., I hit the ground running and started applying to jobs on LinkedIn. I know it probably wasn’t the smartest move, but sometimes you just have to do what you have to do.
What was that conversation with your parents like?
It went remarkably well, all things considered. I only told my dad. He reassured me not to worry because I’ll find something else. I couldn’t bring myself to tell my mom due to her illness, she wouldn’t understand. My mom has dementia, and I’m her primary caregiver. I would’ve loved to have her support now more than ever. She was my best friend, my confidant, and my biggest cheerleader.
Anyone who has cared for a loved one with this disease knows how painful it is to watch them slowly slip away. The shell remains, but the person they were is gone. I digress, so I’ll move on.
What advice would you give to someone reading this that might also experience a layoff while supporting a family member?
The first thing is not to panic, it won’t help you find a solution. If possible, take a few days or even a week to grieve the loss of your job and honor your feelings. Apply for any benefits you qualify for, like unemployment or food stamps. You’ve paid into the system, so you deserve to use it, especially if it helps you until you land your next job. Be kind to yourself, it’s easy to feel like you’re letting down those you care for, but remember to give yourself grace.
Apply for any benefits you qualify for, like unemployment or food stamps. You’ve paid into the system, so you deserve to use it, especially if it helps you until you land your next job.
Did they offer severance?
Yes
How do you plan on utilizing it while you're looking for a new opportunity?
I'm grateful to have received a severance package, first and foremost. The money will go towards supporting my parents and myself until I find another job. It will help cover household expenses like groceries, utilities, emergency repairs (like when the AC broke and I had to call someone), and my own personal bills. I’ll need to be as frugal as possible to make it last, and my hope is that I don’t run through it before finding something new.
What did you do about health insurance?
I have COBRA but only for a few months.
What was your greatest financial concern with the sudden loss of income?
Health insurance and other healthcare-related costs.
Can you speak more on that? Do you know what you'll do after your COBRA ends?
The reason this is such a concern is because I have a chronic condition that can only be managed with medication. Unfortunately, it also means frequent doctor visits, and all of that costs money. Without insurance, the out-of-pocket expenses would be astronomical.
The healthcare system in the U.S. is broken, money comes before human lives. Sorry, I’m stepping off my soapbox now. I don’t have a solid plan for what I’ll do once COBRA ends. My hope is to be employed before then, but if all else fails, I may have to look into something through the Affordable Care Act.
What was the first thing you did after receiving the news?
I don't think this was the smartest thing to do, but I hit the ground running. I started looking for a job immediately. In the past, for me, it's always been difficult to find another opportunity and I've run out of money.
Can you speak to how the job search might be different for someone in their 20s or 30s vs. someone in their 40s and 50s?
In your 20s and 30s, the sky's the limit. There's no concern about being perceived as “too old.” While it's not easier by any means, especially in today's job market, youth can be an advantage. Employers may see younger candidates as quick learners, ready to jump in and hit the ground running.
However, in your 40s and 50s, navigating ageism becomes a reality. You might be interviewed by someone younger, who may question whether you'll fit in with the team because of the age gap. Losing a job at this stage can be especially scary. One of the first thoughts I had was, 'Am I too old?' It’s hard not to wonder how you can compete with younger job seekers in today’s market.
However, in your 40s and 50s, navigating ageism becomes a reality. You might be interviewed by someone younger, who may question whether you'll fit in with the team because of the age gap. Losing a job at this stage can be especially scary.
How has being laid off changed your relationship to work?
I definitely realized that you are just a number. You can put in the long hours and not take your PTO, but in the end they don't see that. They will lay you off anyway. There is no loyalty these days. People at work aren't your family and even necessarily your friends. I've learned my lesson. I will take my PTO and my lunch. I will put myself first.
“My mom has dementia, and I’m her primary caregiver. I would’ve loved to have her support now more than ever. She was my best friend, my confidant, and my biggest cheerleader.”
What's something nice a person can do when their friend or peer gets laid off?
I think reaching out and checking up on them. Take them out for a cup of coffee. Even that small gesture can make a difference. You can look out for jobs that may fit what they're looking for. I think rallying around them to let them know they're not alone.
What do you wish people would STOP saying or doing after someone gets laid off?
Not disappearing would be nice.
Is that something you’ve personally experienced?
I've seen people on LinkedIn share how, after announcing they were laid off, colleagues rallied around them, offering referrals or simply checking in. One person even mentioned a former coworker took them out for coffee to see how they were doing.
Unfortunately, that wasn’t my experience, especially with my former colleagues. It made me realize that, for some, networking is more about numbers than relationships. People at work aren’t necessarily friends or family—that’s a false narrative I had to come to terms with.
What's something cool you've worked on / are working on since the layoff? Share something you're proud of.
I'm trying to strengthen my communication skills by attending webinars. Looking to upskill with classes.
Can you share the resources you've found helpful when it comes to upskilling?
A lot of the webinars I’ve attended mainly focus on strategies and tactics for finding a job. I took a communication course on LinkedIn because I want to improve as a communicator, and I’ve found LinkedIn courses to be pretty solid overall. You can definitely find free courses online to level up your skills. It might sound cliché, but just Google it. It’s a great resource and can really be your best friend
Anything else you'd like to share?
Mindset is one of the most important things when job searching. Don't tie your self-worth to a rejection. You have good and bad days so be patient with yourself.
Jessica is open to work. She’s looking for roles like Senior Ad Operations Manager, Ad Operations Manager, or Senior Ad Operations Specialist. She’s also interested in breaking into the field of Technical Account Management or anywhere her skills are transferrable.
You can reach out to her on LinkedIn.
Have you ever been laid off? I’m collecting interviews for a future Laid Off Trend Report at this survey. You can answer anonymously.